This is a text which I wrote right after the quake happened and posted onto my blog. I don’t know why but I got an urge to write something. I was with my friends but probably I needed to feel more connected with large number of people, desperately. I haven’t read it since.
It’s 21:29. Earthquake is still on going.We’ve never experienced this.
When it happened, I was in a cafe with my friend, we were like, it can’t be that bad so waited for a while, just exchanged anxious looks. However, it went on and on and got worse and worse. Everything was shaking. Coffee slipped from the tray. Wow. I said, FUCKING HELL then I grabbed my friend’s hand and went outside. I felt that it wasn’t usual at all. Everyone was outside, no train was working. We decided to walk back to my apartment; as we walked in front of all the expensive labels stores and things, we talked about how not important they are. AT ALL. Finally we got my apartment which is on the 7th floor, when I opened the door I was shocked. Everything fell off and destroyed. It was still so shaky so we had to fuck off right away. Now I evacuated to my friend’s house nearby. I don’t want to be alone for a while.
This morning on the way to meet my friend, I was listening to the audio book of The Picture of Dorian Grey. That was a part when Dorian discovered how beautiful he is by witnessing the portrait of himself. He then realised that NOTHING LASTS FOREVER, one day he’ll get older and lose his beauty. Then I thought, when you realize beauty of anything( yourself or the world, anything), it works as a curse because you’ll also know, someday you’ll lose everything and then, surrender.
I don’t know, I can’t write well yet